Blogging; Just Adding to the Noise

I get discouraged by all of the noise in our society.  Why should I add to it?

We listen to ipodstelevisionradiocdplayers tereosynchronasticsterepophonic surrounsoundmultichannel noisenoisenoise 24 hours a day, 7 days a week…constantly.  We put in our ipods when driving with other people in the car, fall asleep to music, leave the TV running in the background etc.  Our fears begin to emerge in silence so we crank it up louder in order to avoid them.  This habit drowns out the more important speech of our friends our family and God.  We fervently pray to hear God’s voice, yet we live noisy lives with ears attuned to our iPods rather than the heavens.

I can’t stand it.

I’ve fought this syndrom in my own life and gone months without music or media.  At times I’ve been scared of facebook because I feel as if my spiritual growth could be hindered by dwelling too much in a world of superficial communication.  I often avoid blogs, the newspaper, even books by Christian authors so that I can redirect that time from good sources of truth to the purest and best source of truth, the Bible.

I avoid the noise.

That being said, I have had a hard time writing blog posts, tweeting, or facebooking because I feel as if I contribute to the very noise which I am attempting to avoid.

Am I adding to messy conglomerate of information over-saturation?

Why should I contribute to this “problem” facing our culture currently?

I recall a conversation with Dr. Leland, director of the Focus Leadership Institute, when I asked him “Why would I want to personally create more when the world is hypersaturated with messages, agendas and cluttered media?”  He flipped the question back at me (typical Jesus tactic) and I responded “because I know that the art and messages I create speak truth and bring life to the people receiving them.”  He smiled and responded “and that’s why you should create.”

So create I will.

I will write, sketch, paint, sing, film, photograph, conceptualize, design, and do fun crazy things because I know that anything I create is simply a reflection of the master Creator.  Even if I’m not painting nativity scenes or writing praise songs, truth and beauty can and will be communicated in the work that I do.  I will work hard to be attune with my Creator and then enjoy doing whatever it is that He made me to do and by doing so, be salt and light for a dark flavorless world.

So although I think that the blog world crams information into overflowing minds, I will blog.  Even though I know (as a Marketing major) that you are exposed to 3500-5000 marketing messages a day, I will write.  Even though I know that there are thousands of personal truth claims in the world, I will share.

Why?  Because I know that by doing so I can bring life and beauty to a dark world.

“If we’re adding to the noise, turn off this song” -Switchfoot

If I’m adding to the noise, quit following this blog

The Rainy Kid’s Show

This is a quick design for a poster I did for “The Rainy Kid Show” a benefit concert some friends and I put on at a local coffee shop in Colorado Springs called Jives.

The show couldn’t have gone better:  We all got a chance to play, some people were suuuuper talented throwing together delightful covers with instruments ranging from the guitar, piano, and my alltime favorite:  the strumstick (google it…they’re awesome)

We ended up selling quite a bit of original art, crocheted hats and other really fun goodies.

Grunge Portrait

Kevin Fowler Promo Poster

I’ve recently been contracted out for some freelance design for the company which manages country wester singers Kevin Fowler, Joe Nichols, Eli Young Band, and Jack Ingram.

After looking at what Kevin’s primary audience was and talking with the manager, we nailed down a definite design. I used Photoshop, Illustrator, some hand drawn illustration as well practically drawing Kevin….it took a little longer than I thought, but I’m happy with the final product.

Oh Shoot…

This gallery contains 6 photos.

I’m testing a couple of new illustration techniques that I’m going to start implementing regularly. I’m going to walk you through  my workflow just for fun, so I’ll begin with the final image; Here is the original black and white … Continue reading →

Conflict

This is a short film used as a metaphor between the tense relationship between a father and a son.  I’ve seen some awesome shots which utilize slow motion compiled of pictures but edited in a way to give the illusion of film.  I had to copy it, so here is my first attempt at doing so.

Thanks to my dad and brother for running around in the snow!  I shot and edited the film and just recently wrote the music as well…enjoy!

(oh yeah, watch it on Vimeo to see it in it’s full HD splendor)

Doodles

Sometimes it is just fun to pick up a sharpie and doodle:

“Jesus Wept”

This is the shortest verse in the Bible,  John 11:35

Jesus finds his soul deeply moved and troubled because of the pain Mary felt for the death of her brother Lazarus.  I find it interesting that he is moved so much by this event (twice he felt moved and troubled) yet he knew Lazarus was “only sleeping” and would soon be back to life.

He empathized with Mary just because she was sad.

This is the same man who told a follower to “let the dead bury their own dead.”  How do these two situations reconcile themselves?  Something I need to chew on.

If Only Girls Knew…

“What are some things you wish girls knew to do differently?”

Put on 70% less makeup.  Who God made you is beautiful!  Other guys think you are beautiful.

Don’t flirt unless you mean it.  Personality is no excuse.

Don’t bash the male species in general.  Instead, encourage men to be men.

Don’t micromanage guys and their choices (especially your future sons and husband).  Instead let them make some mistakes, get muddy, make a wrong turn, burn the casserole, maybe even break an arm.  By doing this when you speak up to protect them from the things that really can hurt them…and they will be much more inclined to listen.

To many guys are scared to try new things because they are scared of failure.  Try to create a safe environment where they can fail and still be appreciated and valued.  If you see a guy going out on a limb (trying something new or difficult), give them major major props, it takes courage.

Are You Leading Him On?

“What is one thing that leads you on or causes you frustration, that girls in this culture do often?”

 

Unbeknownst to them, quite a few girls obliviously lead guys on.  If you are aware of a pattern of guys randomly interested in you or asking you out, you’re probably sending signals to them which are interpreted as “I like you” and they are just acting on that signal.  This may not always be the case, but you could probably do a few things to keep guys, especially ones you aren’t interested in, at bay.

A friend of mine, when she hears about a guy that likes her and she doesn’t like him back, will go into “Defcom 5” mode and wouldn’t talk, text, or even make eye contact with him until he gets the message.  I think this might be a little extreme and may not the be the best way to communicate a lack of interest, but guys actually appreciate the feedback and move on without really being hurt.

Likewise, I think you are doing a guy a huge favor by clearly communicating exactly how you feel.  By doing so, you are guarding his heart and keeping him from putting more of himself into the relationship, even if it is nonexistent, than is necessary.

To help illustrate this point a little better, lets swap the scenario.  Say you go on three dates with a guy and you really begin to like him because he tells you how beautiful you are and how great you guys would be together and mentions plans for the future.  By now, you’ve probably named the kids, planned the wedding and are ready for a committed lifelong relationship (I’m being a little sarcastic here, but hey).  Then, he mysteriously quits calling you and never asks you on a date again.  After crying for a while (he really was a good guy) you muster up the courage to call him two weeks later and ask him what happened and he says “I really just don’t like you that much and I never really did.”

Wow.

How do you feel?

Used?

Lied to?

Wouldn’t you rather him just be upfront and say “hey, I don’t know much about you, but I would like to get to know you a little better to see if there is anything there,” all the while generally avoiding false expectations and future talk.

In the same way him being honest with his feeling would be protecting you, valuing you, and guarding your heart from the unnecessary pain of unmet expectations, you can protect, respect and guard guy’s hearts by being honest with them.

When a guy puts his heart out on the chopping block and asks you on a date, do the most loving thing you can;  first respect him for being courageous and asking (its not easy at all), then be honest with him.  If there is no hope, let him know that you’re not interested in him and you won’t be.  Don’t make up some fake excuse that will leave him hanging on a chance if there isn’t one.  If you’re interested but don’t know enough about him or want to see him in a group setting, say so.  This will put the ball in his court to figure out how you can get to know each other in a group before stepping into a more formal dating context.  Be honest about everything; If you aren’t in a place in life where you want to date anyone, or if you’re scared of dating, say that as well.  If you asks you out in a note form and you believe these things should be discussed face to face, tell him so.

After your honest answer, clarify the fact that you are being honest (because you ARE being honest) and then give him more props for being a man and having the courage to ask you out.

Best Friends?

“Can males and females can effectively be best friends?”

Not healthily.

Guys need to have their best friends be guys and girls need girls.

I say this from a very personal level based on my past experiences.  When I first came to A&M, I became great friends with Jenny (not real name).  Now Jenny and I clearly and specifically decided that we were going to be “just friends” and nothing more no matter what and that we would never have a romantic relationship of any type.  With that being said, we became such good friends that we ended up hanging out daily, sometimes for hours.  It was great fun and we became really close and were able to learn a lot from each other.  We didn’t cross any boundaries, didn’t develop feelings for each other, and nothing was blatantly askew.

After a semester of this, I began to realize that while we really were “just friends,” the time we spent together was strongly cutting into the time we spent with friends of our same sex.  Now this in itself doesn’t sound like a terrible thing until you fully realize the implications of what exclusively opposite sex relationships can do you in the big picture.

When I came to A&M, one of my biggest prayers was to find other men of God who I could connect with so that we could encourage, push, love, teach, and hold each other accountable.  These relationships aren’t easy to initiate and maintain and require trust, courage, and hard work…but they are essential for the healthy spiritual growth of an individual seeking Christ.

The main reason I stand by the belief that guys and girls really shouldn’t pursue a best friend non-romantic relationship is the lifetime implications of looking toward the future.  Statistically, 19 out of 20 people (or more) will get married in their lifetime, so looking at how our cross gender relationships will affect our future marriages is very important.  So picture yourself married with two kids.  When things start to get rough (every marriage has rough times) who do you turn to?  It would be somewhat adulterous for a woman struggling in her marriage to run to one of her best guy friends and dump all of her feeling and marital struggles in his lap.  It would be healthy for her to reach out to other women of God, some who might have gone through similar struggles for support, advice and prayer.  Other women can speak her language and can relate and understand how to handle situations far better than the men.  For this reason, it is so important to have a same sex friend base of people who throughout your life you can turn to for advice, encouragement and accountability (and reciprocate that to friends when they are in need).  This model of women teaching women and men building relationships with other men works well and is displayed prominently throughout the Bible.

Take David, a man after God’s own heart.  How in the world did a man so passionate about God end up sleeping with another man’s wife and then murdering her husband?

The real question is when did he turn from God?

He fell when he lacked male to male accountability.  His mighty men and closest friends were off fighting in a war that he should have been at as well.

If David, one of the greatest men in history, hit rock bottom because of a lack of accountability and male relationships, then who are we to disregard the importance of it throughout own lives?

We need to work hard and develop same sex relationships because without them we will die spiritually and can run our lives into the ground.

That being said, it is great to have great sisters and brothers in Christ who can model what it looks like to be Godly men and women as well as help each other out and enjoy friendship with each other.  At A&M, I loved being the “house dad” for a house full of girls that were good friends of mine.  It

was a good for both of us when I could come over and unclog spaghetti from their sink and take care of the squirrel which had lived in their beds and drank from their toilet over Thanksgiving.

Furthermore, I would make an exception to situations where people are placed in a situation where one on one contact is necessary or initiated.  For example my friend went on a mission trip in North Africa where she was paired up with a guy for safety reasons.  They had plenty of good conversations and got to know each other well.  Being a leader of ARTISTS with sisters in Christ required a few one on one coffee conversations to strengthen communication and work through challenges we were facing.  These were hugely necessary and vital to the health of the organization.

Don’t be paranoid and lean too far to one extreme or the other.  Enjoy the people God has placed in your life…that makes Him happy.  This is a careful balancing act of getting to know each other and keeping unhealthy habits in check, so pursue relationships with purpose, being keenly aware of how your actions now affect your future.

Male Leadership

“Do you still believe in male initiated relationships?”

Yes!

The whole female initiated relationship trend is a detrimental effect of the modern feminist movement (note that some excellent things have come from feminism).   Our culture says “Its a new standard, that doesn’t matter,” but it does.

Remember how I said “dating is a foundation for marriage?”

It is.

When you flip roles, it destroys God’s ultimate design for marriage and will destroy relationships immediately or even worse, after marriage.  For this reason, I get very turned off and frustrated with girls who have tried to pursue me.  To see the value in male initiated relationships, you first have to see the value of gender roles within marriage.  I’m hesitant to even bring these up because even saying the words “gender roles” puts you on the burner because culture and even the church have distorted God’s original design for these roles.

If you look at the creation account in Genesis, God created man and woman in His image.  He also created Eve as a suitable helper for Adam.  Saying the word “helper” today has a negative connotation of servanthood, and a doormat type figure.  I strongly disagree with this connotation, but still clearly believe in gender roles within marriage the way God intends and outlines in scripture.  When these roles are followed, women become elevated to a much higher value than history typically has ever given them.  Throughout history, Christianity has been on the forefront of women’s rights and treating them with utmost respect and dignity, only recently in a hyper-feminine culture which has promoted the view that women are higher in value than men has the church said “hold your horses missie.”  Again, this subject ventures into dark parts of history and has the capabilities to hit nerves that run deep into the hearts of passionate women and men so I want to be careful of stepping on toes without explaining why.  In the end, the whole women/men in power and rights is like a giant pendulum.  In the past, women have been objectified, looked down upon, suppressed, and treated as having less value than men.  Today, the pendulum has swung in the opposite direction and we find ourselves ridiculing men, labeling them all as incompetent, pushing for rights that give women more rights and a higher value than men etc.  Both of these environments are off the mark and skew God’s design for gender roles and differences.

God created men and women equal in value and different in roles.

Let me repeat that again:
God created men and women equal in value and different in roles.

This perspective is healthy and something we can cling to.  So when you date someone, how does this apply?  Look at the differences in roles outlined in the Bible (again, ask older wiser people for help on this one) and try your best to ignore our cultural influences and slants, then apply these in a tangible way to a dating relationships.

To get you started, I’ll give you one example from Ephesians 5:25

If a “Husband is supposed to love his wife as Christ loved the church,” what does this look like while dating?

Good question….lets read a little farther.

Christ “gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water…and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.”

In the same way, if you are in a relationship with someone, by doing so, you should become and feel more beautiful and increase your value by helping you pursue holiness.  Don’t get me wrong, this affect on your pursuit of holiness in a premarital context shouldn’t be very intense (he shouldn’t lead you in a weekly Bible study), but if the focus of your relationship is pulling you away, not toward holiness, then something is wrong.

Dating

“What are some things to keep in mind in a dating relationship?”

Whoah…I could write a book.

There are no Biblical verses or passages that talk about dating specifically, but there are many Biblical concepts to apply to the process.  I find it interesting that questions concerning gender roles in dating didn’t exist in the 1950′s because back then, they were so very clearly defined by society (maybe to an unhealthy degree).  Recent cultural changes have muddled and confused these lines beyond recognition and leave our generation grasping for some sort of clarity.

Dating is a foundation for marriage.

Date purposefully and intentionally.  Realize that you are either going to break up with or marry the person you are dating so either way you want to do things right.

Before dating, I would highly suggest you spend some serious time looking at the differences in Biblical roles between men and women in marriage and then apply those principles in a relevant way to help you define your dating relationships, if you don’t want to put forth the effort, or don’t know how do to this, go talk to a wiser Christian woman who has significant experience and success in their marriage because of their understanding of the Bible.

Know that the patterns you set forth in dating will play themselves out in marriage.

If you are impatient and impure in your dating relationship with each other, then you will have a higher likelihood of being impure in your marriage.

If the female dominates and controls the dating relationship, guess who will wear the pants in marriage.

If you lie to each other while dating…well, I think you get the trend.

Note that just like two boards freshly glued together, the long two people are together, the more difficult and painful it is to remove them from each other.  If there are warning flags flying on the first, or fifth date, run away before the glue sets in and you both get hurt beyond repair.  Some valid reasons to throw in the towel on dating someone without the slightest bit of hesitation are if you; can’t be yourself, feel controlled, want your partner to change, have a clash of faith or values, don’t feel physically or emotionally safe, are disrespected, pressured to change your values, feel called different directions, or see a repeating pattern of unhealthy behavior.

There is so much more that can be said about dating to provide some sort of clarity and direction as far as how to glorify God in the midst of it.  So much is situational and requires a certain level of maturity from both people in order to handle the full implications of dating.  Some people just aren’t mature enough to handle this sort of relationship and won’t be for years.

Modesty

My dear sister in Christ, Julianne Baker, is leading a women’s Bible study with ARTISTS, I group near and dear to me at Texas A&M.  She is planning a discussion about male/female relationships and dynamics with the women in her group and asked me to answer some questions in order to reveal a little about the male perspective on some sensitive and misunderstood issues.  The next few posts will be dealing with some of the relevant questions she brought up.

Please read these thoughts and let me know what you honestly think.  Some of these ideas I will stand behind till the day I die and others I will gladly push to the side if a better truth will step up to take its place.  Don’t get upset about something you don’t discuss with me…these succinct statements allow me to present only so much.  Note also that these questions are written for other women seeking God so the answers may not lend themselves to an overly secular discussion without laying down some very important foundations concerning our diverse perspectives of viewing the world.

So read and dissect these honest answers and I hope and pray that you perceive these as being filled with truth sandwiched between love and encouragement.

“Chris, what do YOU consider to be modest?”

No cleavage.

No midriff.

Period.

Be very careful with tight shirts and short shorts.  Concerning some clothes, you will have to personally wrestle with and pray about to find your own personal boundaries.  Note that if you catch him looking down your shirt, its your fault he has that opportunity (yes, he has responsibility too, but don’t shun that on him).  In general, be constantly aware of what other guys are allowed to see, including your body position.  Don’t lean forward with a loose shirt, bend over at the waist (kneel instead), and be careful with skirts.  Even stretching with both arms up can prominently display things that catch guy’s attention in an unhealthy way.

Over the last few years, my view on modesty have shifted fairly drastically.  I used to think that an immodest girl was “hot,” but recently, I’ve seen past outer, superficial attraction and now I see immodesty as a byproduct of insecurity and a sad search for love in the wrong ways, neither of which is attractive.  Not being modest is selfish at the core.  You are not loving your brothers in Christ and feeding the biggest struggle in their life just so you can get a little more attention and/or feel a little better about yourself.  If you don’t believe that lust is a big issue with guys today, let me open your eyes a little.

-25% of all search engine requests are pornographic in nature

-50% of all Christian men are addicted to pornography (20% of women)

These statistics are terrifying.

Guys are very very very visually inclined and can be thinking terrible things about you from across the room (or even when you’re not around) if you give their imaginations food.  Why even walk close to the line?

I want you ladies to be scared of the lust monster that is roaming around uninhibited.  These are the facts, this is truth, and a healthy dose of it keeps us on our toes.  Remember “your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:8).  Satan wants us to be unaware of his presence and by listening to the lie “it’s no big deal, I can wear this today” is exactly the sort of underbrush he likes to hide behind.  Don’t exclude yourself from this, I honestly think 95% of unmarried women are extremely naive about how big this is and the other 5% are just mostly naive.

That being said, most Christian guys desperately want to think pure thoughts and try very hard to fight what gets thrown in their face day after day after day so also don’t be so paranoid that you think that all guys are dirtbags and deserve to die.

So please, love your brothers in the way you dress.  Sad and true, you may not get the same amount of attention, but the attention you would be getting, even from the right kind of guys, is completely for the wrong reasons.

Elephant Supper

Ned sat down to eat an elephant.
He knew he could do it and live to tell of it.
So with salt, pepper, a knife and a fork,
he blessed his huge supper and started to work.
Ned started at the head and worked toward the tail.
He wouldn’t stop or slow down. Yes, he would prevail.
He ate and he ate and he ate and he ate
and the elephant slowly vanished from his very large plate.
His jaw soon got tired as he chomped and he chewed,
never had it processed this much food.
Baked, sauteed, and even deep fried,
Ned couldn’t eat it all, no matter how hard he tried.
His stomach bulged out, he let out a wail,
Ned painfully realized that he had failed.
However he had newfound wisdom both profound and relevant.
That no man can possibly eat a whole elephant.

I wrote this poem about 1 Corinthians 12 concerning spiritual gifts.

We each have our own unique spiritual gifts. It is silly and foolish to think we could have all of them.